I've worked in a variety of restaurants and in almost every position over the last 9 1/2 years. People gave the NFL a bad wrap for the "locker room culture" but seem to have no idea just how bad it is in restaurants. Racism and sexism run amuck and from some of the people you'd least expect it. It's not even hidden from view: have you noticed that all the waiters are white, all the hostesses are attractive young women, all the bus boys are black and all the line cooks are Mexican? This is an industry that is dominated by young people, and yet it is one of the most intolerant and inhospitable working environments imaginable.
I actually work for a rather open minded company (comparatively) without the same degree of overt racial job classification; but that doesn't do much to change the culture among their employees. I should be careful to note that this isn't a blanket accusation, it is merely a reflection of a general trend. I'm proud to say that I work with a man who not only doesn't subscribe to this nastiness, but who also calls other people out when their behavior crosses the line. His example inspired me to do the same.
Aside from the obvious demographic separation that keeps certain groups working certain jobs, there is a more flagrant racism that runs rampant. Servers judge the tables they have to take before they even talk to them, and assume that their tip will reflect as much. If you are Black, Latino, Indian, Native American, Asian American, foreign (with accent especially), young, old, or you look poor, then your server is probably pissed you just sat at their table. Surprisingly, they don't even like rich people; black Amex card holders are notoriously poor tippers (at least in casual dining). This doesn't just apply to white servers, I've heard black people use the "N word" and latinos say "wetbacks." You just can't make this stuff up. I've heard the "N word" so many time that it is no longer a shock to me anymore; that is both terrifying and saddening. While I will never find this type of behavior justifiable, to a certain extent, it is actually understandable.
I would be lying if I said that over my nine years in the business I didn't notice discrepancies among different races and ethnicities in the tip percentage left for the server. Even so, I think this effect is magnified because there is an expectation for it, and servers go around holding up the credit slip saying "See, see! I told you so" every time it happens. A servers biggest resource is his time, often we are over burdened with more tables that we can actually take care of; this is when racism is most notable. If you have 8 tables and two of them are black families, you tend to give them the worst service because you don't think they were going to tip you well anyway. Servers aren't rich people and it only makes sense that they would seek to maximize their profits on every given night.
This, of course, leads to a problem of causality. Even if we accept the notion that certain ethnicities and races tip worse than others we don't know if it is because they are cheap or because they got worse service. Besides, if you were a black family with a teenage child who couldn't find any work, then you went out to eat and all 25 servers working were white, would you feel compelled to leave a big tip?
I want to leave you with a true story about one of my more positive restaurant experiences, hopefully you'll see that we aren't all so bad. I was waiting on a large family of Indians (from India not Native Americans) towards the end of one of my serving shifts. Another server told me they were terrible tippers so my expectations weren't that great. I wasn't terribly busy since it was the end of the night so I did my best to give them great service (I would have tried anyway, I always try to give great service so that I earn the right to complain about bad tips). I figured, even if I bumped the tip from 5% to 10%, that that would be double the amount I would have made otherwise (not rocket science). Their bill ended up being around $150 dollars and the father came up to me and handed me two $100 bills. In perfect English he told me, "You are the first person who didn't judge us and gave us great service, thank you. Please, keep the change."
I am under no illusion that that is the norm, I've had my fair share of bad tips (or no tips) even when everything was perfect. But it does go to show, you never know. Either way, I need to feel like a good person, often in spite of "restaurant culture."
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